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My Story

Hi!  My name is Tina Smith and I want to share with you my story of the redemption of Jesus Christ in my life.

To look at me today, you would have never guessed the road I took to get here.  It is a road paved with a happy, carefree childhood, which took a turn through subtle poor choices that lead to a path of destruction. Yes, destruction, with one particular choice that I will regret the rest of my life.  Mine is also a story of redemption and salvation and restoration.  A story of hope.  I want to share my story to encourage anyone who may find themselves in a place of hopelessness. May you know that there is freedom and healing and surely a hope of a future.
 
I grew up the oldest of four children.  My father did well as a self-employed school photographer and provided the nicer things in life.  Summers were spent on a lake and vacations to the beach and Disney World were the norm.  We never lacked for anything materially.  I always knew that I was loved by both my parents completely and unconditionally. 
 
I entered my turbulent teenage years much like everyone else.  Rebellious at times, mouthy and thinking I knew it all.  That was also a time when life became very turbulent in our home, ending with my parents divorce.  Just before my parents split I began attending church with a boyfriend.  It was during a Coffee House at this church that I made the decision to accept Jesus Christ as my Savior.  I knew immediately that something had changed inside me.  It was my senior year of high school.
 
I would love to finish this story right now with how that decision changed everything and I lived happily ever after.  However, that was just the beginning of the path of destruction I paved.  Through a series of decisions, I found myself on my own at the age of 18.  I was working full time right out of high school to pay my bills and keep food on my table.  I had my own apartment.  My family left the area and moved 12 hours away.  I was on my own.
 
My boyfriend and I continued to go to church together on the weekends and were also secretly….or so we thought…..sleeping together during the week.  He was the first one that I had ever had sex with, but he wasn’t the first one I had flirted with the idea of having sex with.  I knew it was wrong, but sex is much like a drug….an addiction…..that one does not just stop.  I knew it was wrong but I felt trapped by my own body and my own desires.  I was also very afraid that if I refused, I would lose the person that was the biggest part of my world.  So, we continued in our own little deception.  Not only deceived ourselves, but we deceived everyone around us, and especially our families and those we went to church with.
 
What normally happens when people have sex happened to us.  We found ourselves pregnant.  I was twenty years old, on my own and scared to death that morning I read the results of the home pregnancy test. I called my boyfriend and told him the news.
 
A few days later we were off to the abortion clinic.  I remember on the ride home saying that I did not know how God could forgive us for such things.  We quietly swept it under the rug and didn’t speak of it.  It was over…..or so I thought.  That is the decision I will forever regret making.

 
We continued our double lives of church going saints and sexual lovers and decided to get engaged a year or two later.  We were so happy and excited to be getting married.  Our wedding day was filled with so much fun and happiness and people who loved us deeply.  I wore white, although I was anything but pure.  The idea of being married made all that had happened null and void, or so it seemed. 
 
 
 
 
 
 
I can honestly say that the first five years of our marriage were
wonderful. We bought our first home, we had our first…..well what
everyone else thought was our first……child and life was good.  But, the Bible is very clear that what we reap what we sow.  The
relationship that I began in deceit was about to end in deceit.
 
At the time I became pregnant with our second child, I sensed that my husband didn’t share the same excitement and enthusiasm that I did about it.  We were becoming more and more distant.  I tried all I could to make our home a happy place, but there was so much anger and resentment in my heart, I would lose it with the kids and lose it with my husband.  It was anything but a happy place to be. 
 
It was a couple years past the birth of our second child that I found out that my husband had a “friend” that he was spending time with and despite attempts at restoring the marriage, it ended just like it started, in deceit.  We had never stopped going to church, however, going to church didn’t seem to make any difference.  We were now a statistic.
 
I found myself twelve hours from my closest relative, a single mom of a four and two year old and alone again, with a whole lot of baggage I was carrying around.  I remember saying to a dear friend on the phone one night:  “I can’t live like this anymore.” 
 
You see, I had accepted Jesus’ gift of salvation, but I never surrendered my life to Him.  It was at this point that I totally and completely surrendered my life to Jesus Christ and made him not only my Savior but also Lord of my life.  I was going to follow Jesus no matter what the outcome.  He began setting me free from things like control, fear, unbelief, pride, lust and many other things that I had allowed to control my life.  I began walking in a new freedom that I had never experienced before. 
 
Life certainly wasn’t what I would call easy after that, but it didn’t matter, Jesus was setting me free and I was walking in newness of life.   I could see his provision for me and for my children and the abundance of His blessings.  Now going to church really meant something and I was growing.  My children were growing in grace and God began setting them free of things that bound them.  Life had meaning and purpose.
 
A couple years later God brought a man into my life who loved Jesus and loved me unconditionally, poor choices and all.  He chose commitment and responsibility to me and my children and never looked back.  It hasn’t been an easy road, to say the least, second marriages come with many challenges, but God has been incredibly faithful to us.  God blessed us with two children of our own who are deeply loved by their older brother and sister and God has gone before us with this blended family we have. 

We have a God of second chances.
 
My hope in sharing my story, is that it will give you hope.  If you find yourself in an impossible place of hopelessness, I pray that you will seek out Jesus.  He loves you unconditionally and He died for all those wrong choices that you’ve made.  Here’s how you can receive Christ:  1) Admit your need. (I am a sinner.)  2)  Be willing to turn from your sins (repent).  3)  Believe that Jesus Christ died for you on the Cross and rose from the grave.  4)  Through prayer, invite Jesus Christ to come in and control your life through the Holy Spirit.  (Receive Him as Lord and Savior.)
 
Are you ready to make the decision to accept Jesus Christ into your life?  Click here and allow the words on that page to lead you into a relationship with Jesus.